He: Pissed off because he thinks I don't appreciate how much work he does around the house.
Me: Pissed off because he can't focus on one project and complete it without first starting ten other projects. Hence, we always have a zillion unfinished projects.
He: Argues with me. Throws in minor insults, which we both know he doesn't mean but he says because he's mad.
Me: Same as above
He: Repeat Step Two
Me: Clams up. Lets him vent. Doesn't say much. Doesn't argue with him - makes sure he gets it all out. I let most things pass, but every once in awhile he says something that I completely and totally disagree with in which case we find ourselves back at Step Two.
He: Eventually softens and cools down. Starts to understand my original point of view. Apologizes.
He: Next day. Tells me how bad he feels about conversation the night before and apologizes yet again.
I wonder if most couples have some sort of dance to the way they argue or disagree? So long as the dance doesn't include physical harm, I'm guessing it's probably a good thing ....